Should I go to therapy? How do I know?

How many times have you found yourself wondering if the supports that you have in your life are enough, what you need at this time, or even healthy? Have you ever felt lonely, misunderstood and fearful of communicating your struggles to others? If these questions feel very familiar to you, then it might be a good idea for you to keep reading this article. 

There is so much stigma and misinformation about what counselling and psychotherapy involve and that’s why people don’t seek counselling when they could. Depending on their cultural background, gender, age and family perceptions, people might see counselling as either a waste of money or only needed in case of emergency. Of course, this is not everyone’s view, but I would dare to say that even though the taboo surrounded therapy has decreased over many years, there is still a lot of people who think about therapy as unnecessary or as a resource for the weak or mentally ill.

The truth is that these misconceptions were born centuries ago when mental health struggles were associated with demonic possession, witchcraft, and lack of values and discipline. It wasn't until the 19th century when theories such as Psychoanalysis started to shed light into what might be happening in our minds when we struggle emotionally. At the same time, Psychoanalysis was also very controversial. Even though I believe that it did way more good than harm to the field of psychology, still a lot of current mistaken ideas about therapy are rooted in misinterpretations of Psychoanalysis. Of course, with this rough start it makes sense why up to this date I continue to hear comments like "I don't want to go to therapy to talk about my oedipus complex ", "counselling is for those who are incapable of dealing with life”, or “if you need to go to therapy there is something wrong with you." 

My answer to these comments is always the same. Counselling is for everyone!! No matter your age, race, socioeconomic status, or gender identity, if you feel like you would like to get some extra support in your life or just a quiet space to self-reflect and grow then you are a great candidate for counselling. If your struggles are too heavy and feel like you need to heal from emotional wounds, counselling can be good for you as well. Also, just to clarify, it is not true that you will always need to talk about your mother in therapy.

We tend to forget that counselling is not a resource available only during life crisis or when you finally broke down. In fact, counselling can be preventive, and it can also help you develop coping and problem-solving skills that can save you a lot of suffering in the future. 

I generally tell people that if they are asking themselves the question, it would probably be a good idea to pay attention to it and seek counselling support. Often times, when people experience challenges that negatively impact their functioning in one or more of the main three areas of life: Social/interpersonal relationships, Work/School and Home/Family life, then counselling might be useful. However, the best person to determine if it is a good time to seek extra help is you and your loved ones who sometimes can notice things that you don't.

If you are still doubting if  you should seek counselling support, you can ask yourself:
*Have I struggled with this issue(s) for a long period of time and have tried to make it better without success?
*Is my issue(s) negatively impacting my life in any of the three main areas of life (described above)?
*Have I ever been told by loved ones that I should try counselling and have I thought that they might be right?
*Are you curious about yourself, and would like to understand yourself better?
*Do you feel stuck in your life or confused?
*Have you identified in yourself some patterns of behaviour that don’t really serve you?  
*Have you ever felt that painful things have happened to you but that you have pushed them all away?
*Have you ever thought that you would like to learn coping strategies to deal with life situations?

If you responded “Yes” to at least one of these questions I believe that you might have your answer. Just remember that it is never too late to work on yourself, heal, learn, and grow. Listen to yourself. If you feel ready, take advantage of the momentum, take control over the situation and reach out for support.

Author: 

Susan Salazar is a Registered Clinical Counsellor in Vancouver, BC. who has years of experience providing counselling to adults, children and youth from North and South America. Susan also enjoys writing about topics related to psychotherapy, mental health, social justice, women's wellness, children and parenting.